Updated the first post: December 16th, 11AM, we performed the upgrade. There was a brief downtime of around 10-60 minutes, but everything should be fixed now! Timeout problems and the site going slow should be a thing of the past (or as a result of your ISP and not us for a change). Hooray!
If anyone is still having issues feel free to report them, for as far as we know everything should be working perfectly for now!
If you have any detailed error reports or anything please email them to firstname.lastname@example.org or reply here.